Transgender killer Audrey Hale wrote about her ‘imaginary penis’ and the way she would ‘kill’ to get puberty blockers within the weeks earlier than her horrific assault on the Covenant College in Nashville final yr.
The Tennessee Star obtained some 4 dozen pages of Hale’s writings that make clear her female-to-male transition and why she shot and killed six individuals on the elementary faculty in March 2023.
Hale wrote about anger towards her mother and father, how she hated her conservative Christian upbringing, and the way she had suffered as a result of hormone blockers weren’t out there when she was as a toddler.
The explosive writings, generally known as Hale’s ‘manifesto,’ have been a supply of controversy, with many accusing officers of protecting them secret as a result of they might damage the trans neighborhood.
Now launched, they assist clarify why the 28-year-old artist, who recognized as a male named Aiden, shot her manner into the Tennessee faculty, killing three adults and three nine-year-olds, earlier than responding officers killed her.
Audrey Hale (pictured), 28, was a transgender artist, who recognized as a male named Aiden, shot her manner into the Tennessee elementary faculty final March, killing three adults and three nine-year-olds earlier than responding officers killed her
Hale is proven inside the college, which she attended years earlier than she returned to carry terror to its school rooms
Hale’s journal entries start with the title ‘My Imaginary Penis’ and embrace a crude drawing, based on The Star.
‘My penis exists in my head. I swear to god I am a male,’ Hale wrote within the papers, which have been recovered by police.
She then wrote about her want to have a penis so she might have intercourse with a girl, in her assumed id as Aiden.
She wrote about how utilizing that title on a job software for a supply place led to points with the corporate’s background examine.
Hale additionally mentioned that being raised as a lady was ‘torture.’
She nervous that top faculty classmates would name her ‘dyke or a f*****’, she wrote.
That each one modified when she discovered about transgenderism in her early 20s.
‘I lastly discovered the reply — that altering one’s gender is feasible,’ wrote Hale.
However her mum was not on board, Hale wrote.
‘What she believes, how she grew up, conservatively, and that LGBTQ — particularly transgender — was an enigma, almost non-existent,’ Hale wrote.
She added: ‘I hate parental views; how my mother sees me as a daughter — and he or she’d not bear to wish to lose that daughter as a result of a son could be the dying of Audrey.’
Hale used violent language when speaking concerning the emergence of puberty blockers within the 2010s.
They have been hailed on the time for serving to transgender pre-teens safely delay the onset of puberty.
Cops gunned down Hale throughout her ‘fastidiously deliberate’ assault by which she killed three youngsters and three adults
Hale, pictured forward of her transition into ‘Aiden,’ wrote extensively about her mindset and detailed plans to trigger terror in a manifesto that has but to be formally launched
A few of Audrey Hale’s writings have been leaked beforehand, resulting in the suspension of law enforcement officials
‘I might kill to have these assets,’ wrote Hale.
‘2007 was the start of puberty blockers and a newfound discovery for remedy of non-conforming transgender youngsters.’
They got here too late for Hale, who ‘was within the sixth grade, puberty already hit me,’ she wrote.
She additionally mentioned fantasizing about having intercourse as a person by creating scenes along with her stuffed animals.
‘I can fake to be them [and] do the issues boys do [and] expertise my boy self as Tony,’ she wrote.
Tony was her ‘stuffed boy doll’ which she wrote ‘is just like the boy I’m in one other type.’
She simulated intercourse between Tony and one other smooth toy over the course of hours, she wrote.
She even took images of the scene and misplaced monitor of time.
‘God, I’m such a pervert.’ Hale wrote, ‘I waste an excessive amount of time in my fantasies.’
The entry was written simply 16 days earlier than Hale wearing fight gear and launched her lethal raid on the Covenant College, armed with two assault-type weapons and a handgun.
Hale additionally wrote politically charged feedback concerning the rights of gun homeowners and trans individuals.
‘So now in America, it makes one a prison to have a gun or, be transgender, or non-binary,’ she wrote Hale.
‘God, I hate these s***head politicians,’ she added.
The papers have been recovered from Hale’s automotive, which she left outdoors the college, and have been offered to the Star by a supply near the investigation.
After the capturing, Nashville’s Metropolitan Police Chief John Drake mentioned his pressure had recovered the shooter’s manifesto, in addition to hand-drawn maps in her automotive, and mentioned they might ultimately be made public.
However each metropolis police and the FBI later mentioned the fabric should not be launched as a result of it might damage the investigations.
Katherine Koonce, head of faculty (left), and Mike Hill, a custodian (proper) have been amongst these shot lifeless by Audrey Hale
Substitute instructor Cynthia Peak, 61, often known as Cindy, (proper, along with her daughter Ellie) was considered one of six individuals shot and killed
In her twisted manifesto, Hale wrote about concentrating on youngsters at ‘fancy non-public colleges’, regardless of beforehand attending the Covenant faculty herself
Hale’s disturbing writings worryingly cited ‘a number of occasions’ that she ‘might have been caught’ previous to her rampage that killed six
The Star and others have been a part of a lawsuit looking for to compel the Metro Nashville Police Division (MNPD) and the FBI to launch Hale’s writings.
The FBI reportedly suggested the MNPD to not launch them and different ‘legacy tokens’ within the wake of mass shootings.
The households of Hale’s victims subsequently stepped in and change into a part of a public data lawsuit in opposition to town.
They claimed the killer’s property contains the manifesto and that they due to this fact personal the copyright and might decide whether or not or to not launch it.
Hale’s manifesto has lengthy been anticipated to disclose extra element concerning the killer’s motive.
Final November, three web page of notes written by Hale forward of the capturing have been leaked.
The notes revealed Hale’s plan to focus on ‘white privileged cr***ers’ and ‘f****ts,’ earlier than turning the gun on herself.
In an entry on the day of the assault, Hale wrote: ‘At this time is the day. The day has lastly come. I can not consider it is right here. Do not know the way I used to be capable of get this far however right here I’m.
‘I am just a little nervous however excited too, been excited for the previous two weeks.’
She then declared: ‘I am prepared … I hope my victims aren’t.’
‘God let my wrath take over my nervousness. It could be 10 minutes tops. It could be 3-7. It is gonna go fast. I hope I’ve a excessive dying depend. Able to die,’ she wrote, earlier than heading on her manner towards Covenant.
She was finally shot lifeless at 10.25am, 14 minutes after she started capturing.
An post-mortem revealed Hale’s clothes was coated in ‘handwritten phrases, drawings and numbers’.
It is unclear what was written on her garments.
The shooter additionally wrote a plastic orange anklet inscribed with the mysterious quantity ‘508407.’
Following that leak, seven Nashville law enforcement officials have been suspended after a probe into how the notes grew to become public.
